“Thank you for being my customers,” the shop owner said to a group of prospects who seemed to be loitering in his small mall-based store. The uniqueness of his statement was that it was directed at three teenagers each with very loud dispositions, extremely baggy pants, and earphones hooked up to their IPods. Out of earshot of the owner, one young man remarked to his buddies, “Man, we gotta buy something!” As they left the check-out counter, the store owner shot point blank one final blast of benevolence: “Please visit me again.”

Grace is typically used in a religious setting —it means “unmerited favor or love.” Applied to customer service it is generosity expressed in an unlikely context. It is an assertion, not a response; an attitude, not a tactic. We get a glimpse when we witness a “random act of kindness.” Only service grace is not random, it is continual. Like the teenagers in the opening story, it causes customers to act their best. It can tame hostility, enrich the ordinary, and add “a story to tell” to “I got my money’s worth.” What is the anatomy of service grace? It is three things--being really good, eliminating the hassles, and adding a surprise.

Be Really Good

It made business headlines this past summer. The most popular brand in the world focused on the experience, not just their long-famous product. Coca-Cola introduced their "Freestyle" vending machine. Their ad copy described it as "all packaged in an innovative and interactive fountain experience."

It was designed with help from Ferrari! Step one, pick your favorite Coke beverage—Fanta, Sprite, Minute Maid lemonade, CokeZero, etc. Step two, pick your favorite flavoring. Want a raspberry Coke, a peach Fanta or a coconut flavored lemonade? There are over 100 combinations. A plastic cup is filled with ice and your special concoction.

By watching patterns Coca-cola is able to introduce new products tailored precisely to customers' latest whims.

Watership Down is Richard Adams’ best-selling novel about a group of wild rabbits forced to abandon their warren and travel across England in search of a new home. Along their journey they encounter a group of caged rabbits--pets of a young boy. Opening the cage door, the wild rabbits invite the boy’s pets to join them on their cross-country adventure. “Who will protect us from the big dog?” they asked, moving to the back of their cage. “And, how will we get food; the little boy always feeds us?” The wild rabbits’ answer was much like Col. Hogan’s answer to Sgt. Schultz’ question in Hogan’s Heroes: “Colonel, why do you keep trying to escape when we treat you so well?”

Compassionate control is still control. Customer communications can be the target of caring constriction and kind control, leaving the customer caged by the conversation. Controlling communication can also leave the service provider with the illusion the relationship with customers is a positive one. When the restaurant maitre de hears, “Fine,” in response to his “Is everything alright?” question, he fails to realize he has caged the guest into a controlling query wired to favor an affirmative answer.

"How are you doing on customer loyalty?" we asked the CEO. "Great," he told us, "our new loyalty program is really having an impact!" We probed further. "And, how do you know?" The CEO smiled and responded. "Well, our customer sat score is now up to 89 percent. We're in much better shape on customer retention."

His answers were typical from someone who assumed that dissatisfaction is at one end of the scale and loyalty is at the other end of the same scale. In fact, those two words require two different scales--dissatisfaction to satisfaction; and, not loyal to devoted.

Satisfaction tells us little about a person's loyalty. Assuming that satisfaction is on the continuum with loyalty relies on three myths surrounding the impact of customer loyalty on the bottom line:

1. Satisfaction is a measure of retention;
2. Retention is the same as loyalty; and
3. An affinity program is the best ticket to getting you there.

While all of these have a ring of truth, all are false.

Satisfaction vs. Loyalty

It made business headlines this summer. The most popular brand in the world focused on the experience, not just their long-famous product. Coca-Cola introduced their “Freestyle” vending machine. Their ad copy described it as “all packaged in an innovative and interactive fountain experience.” Step one, pick your favorite Coke beverage—Fanta, Sprite, Minute Maid lemonade, Coke, etc. Step two, pick your favorite flavoring. Want a raspberry coke or a peach Fanta? There are at least 100 combinations.

Now, here is the best part. At the end of the day the vending fountain sends all the combinations chosen to the R&D unit at Coca-Cola headquarters. By watching patterns Coca-cola is able to introduce new products tailored precisely to customers’ latest whims.

Customer expectations have been rising for years. Customers want service faster, cheaper and without a hassle. But, with the advent of CRM and JIT manufacturing, they have added “have it your way” to their service expectations. Long gone are the Henry Ford-like sentiments that communicate: “the customer can have any color they like as long as it is black.” The more organizations offer a myriad of choices, the more all “one-size fits all” approaches look out-of-date.

We checked in to the Lake Lure Inn. Build in 1927, the antique North Carolina hotel served as command central for the making of the movie Dirty Dancing. You can now stay in the Patrick Swayze Suite or the Jennifer Gray Suite. Furnished with exquisite period furniture with meticulous attention to detail, guests feel elevated, enchanted and enriched.

We had dinner in their lovely Veranda Restaurant overlooking the full moonlit lake only a stones through away from our front-row table. The staff was all locals from the rural small NC mountain town. They reached way beyond their plain heritage in a noticeable effort to create a sense of elegance. After seating us at our reserved table, the maitre de presented our menus, wine list, and graciously said, “Hope ya’ll enjoy”--not a phrase you’d hear at a five-star Boston restaurant. Nevertheless, we felt very special. There was an earnest effort to take the experience much, much higher than Nettie’s Diner down the street.

The branding of cattle began in this country because cattle shared open grazing range throughout the West. Barbed wire fence would later alter the practice. When it came time to drive cows to market, the hot tattoo was a convenient way to identify a particular cow.

The golden arches today help us identify a particular fast-food restaurant; an apple with one bite removed identifies a particular computer company. Brands are powerful tools for customer trust. They spell "consistency" and "reliability."

There is a very big difference between simply recognizing a McDonald's and adoring it.

The word "brand" is typically associated with image—logo, signage, impression, promotion, etc. Companies protect brands with the same fervor they guard patents, trademarks, and company secrets. Let a new hamburger enterprise opt for silver arches as its emblem and even a clown named Ronald will have something to say about it. Try mass marketing your homemade lemonade that your creative daughter named Pepsi and see if you don't get an unhappy lawyer knocking on your door.

Early one morning I was in my side yard and walked up on a huge elaborate spider web complete with its designer-tenant. As I approached the artwork, the spider began to vibrate the web sending early morning dewdrops everywhere. The next morning the web was gone without a trace. However, spread between two nearby trees was a brand new web just as elegant as the first one.

A friend was checking out of a Ritz-Carlton hotel early one morning. Half-asleep, she noticed the ever-smiling clerk kept leaving the counter to go elsewhere with each step of the transaction. It was then that my friend embarrassingly realized she was at the concierge counter, not at the check-out counter. She apologized for making the clerk do extra work. “Don’t be silly, Ms. Cook,” said the very patient clerk. “You can check out wherever you like.”

Today’s stressed customers are weary of inflexible, one-size-fits-all, bureaucratic service. They know adaptable service because they have witnessed it elsewhere. And, as their economic worries mount, their tolerance for rules-R-us rigidity plummets. Show them indifference toward their plight and you inviting them to exit forever along with their funds. It pays to demonstrate the adaptability of a spider that starts a new day by constructing a new web.

Customers are favorably attracted to organizations when they get an emotional connection from employees. This means heart-touching encounters filled with spirit, caring and a positive attitude. Below are ten ways for building customer devotion through emotional connections. Think of these as ways to convey the “touch” of remarkable service—the type of experience that makes customers remark positively to their friends.

Be the Attitude You Want Your Customers to Show

We all enjoy serving happy customers. You can help them act pleasant by showing them exactly how. Aim your eyes and very best smile at your customer. Then, deliver a warm greeting that says: “I can’t wait to give you really terrific customer service.” Optimism and joy are contagious. Smile at someone and watch the response you get back. Sure once in a while you get a sourpuss convinced his or her face will shatter by returning the smile. But, most people will give back a pleasant countenance. Great service begets cooperative, easy-to-serve customers.

Never Let Customers Leave Disappointed

“You make me want to be a better man.” These were the most quoted lines in the hit movie “As Good As It Gets.” It was Jack Nicholson’s awkward “terms of endearment” directed at new girlfriend Helen Hunt. The words capture the essence of the nobility of service—helping customers source their higher self. And, in challenging times when so much in customers’ lives pulls them down, noble service can help them pursue their best.

Noble service is sourced in joy and fun—a better emotional place than simply “good service.” It comes from the same part of our soul that organizes a party or does a favor for a friend. When that part is used regularly, it raises self-esteem, increases resilience, and improves morale. Take a look at Fortune Magazine’s annual “Best Companies in America to Work For”—Nordstrom, Container Store, Marriott, eBay, and FedEx—and you see the noble service-high morale link. They boast the lowest turnover (a cost saver), the best recruits (an investment), the highest productivity (another positive hit to the balance sheet) and the greatest profits.

Noble Service Comes From Excellence